


With A Smile

by healthydrugs



Category: Bleach
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Depression, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, M/M, Out of Character, Past Character Death, Songfic, im sorry, musician!grimmjow, sad!ichigo, they're both little shits
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-02
Updated: 2016-06-02
Packaged: 2018-07-11 21:42:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7071544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/healthydrugs/pseuds/healthydrugs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Grimmjow wants Ichigo to know just how much he gets by with a smile from him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	With A Smile

**Author's Note:**

> im an angsty person, im sorry okkkk. i wrote this a while back but never posted it because i kind of hated it at the time but now im just like fuck it lol.
> 
> https://soundcloud.com/chamsy/with-a-smile-by-aiza-seguerra  
> https://youtu.be/vUjPUjLMwD0
> 
> if you want to listen to the song (:
> 
>  
> 
> \--healthydrugs--

_ 1994 _

  
  


“ _Ichigo!_ _Get back here-_

 

Ichigo slammed the door of his house and ran, ignoring the gruff drunken voice that was cursing him. 

 

He just  _ ran. _

 

He ran past his classmates and friends who were walking home from school.

 

He ran past the old lady he would always help carry groceries for.

 

He ran past the stupid alley cat he would always bring milk to.

 

He ran and ran until his feet felt like they were on pins and needles and his lungs burned with an absolute need for oxygen. 

 

Ichigo reached a plain, creaky bench near a bus stop and sat down, bringing his knees close to his chest. 

 

After a few minutes of heaving and recovering from his run, he laid his forehead against his knees and pulled his hood up. 

 

He realized that the moisture running down his face and neck wasn’t sweat at all, but tears.

 

Ichigo looked up at the grey and somber skies, his normally scowling face blank and the brown eyes that were normally warm and expressive were misty and hazy.  

 

He cursed the world, he cursed whatever God was out there and he cursed whoever took away his beloved mother and sweet sisters. 

 

His face scrunched up in pain and sorrow, his head hanging in shame and his pursed pale lips were quivering. 

 

_ Why couldn’t it have been me instead? _

 

He held his knees closer to his chest, trying to hide his pain from the world. 

 

_ Mom… Yuzu… Karin…. _

 

_ Why’d you leave me here? _

 

Ichigo felt his phone vibrating from his back pocket and ignored it. 

 

He didn’t want anyone to see him like this. He was a mess. A broken crying mess. 

 

After the eighth attempt of a call, he gave up. Ichigo exhaled a shaky breath, wiped his tears away, and cleared his throat. 

 

“...Yeah?” 

 

He winced, even he could tell how bad his voice sounded.

 

“..... Where are you, Ichigo?” 

 

_ Grimmjow _ . 

 

His eyes widened as he realized who that husky and low voice belonged to. 

 

_ Fuck. _

 

“Ah, I’m at Chad’s house- 

 

“Ichigo,  _ where are you?”  _

 

His boyfriend’s voice was laced with concern and worry. Ichigo can already picture his boyfriend’s frown and the wrinkle between his brows. 

 

“....”

 

“Ichigo,  _ please _ …”

 

“I- I’m fine, Grimm.” 

 

Without even having to hear the crack in his voice or the weak tone that followed it, he knew it wasn’t very convincing. 

 

“Ichi-

 

“Grimm, stop, seriously. I’m okay, nothing’s wrong. Besides, don’t you have a recital to get to? ‘M sorry I’m not going to be able to make it this time, but you better knock ‘em dead, got that?” He huffed up a feeble laugh and hung up, making sure to turn off his phone afterwards. 

 

Ichigo conjured up a weak smile, recalling the memory of the first time he met the blue haired musician. 

 

_ He was sitting on a chair surrounded by his closest friends and listening to Renji as he told a stupid joke.  _

 

_ He didn’t really find it funny, but just laughed for the sake of it.  _

 

_ Ichigo felt eyes boring into the side of his face and turned to find the direction it was coming from.  _

 

_ Blue eyes that seemed to be glaring at him from across the room came from a blue haired student that transferred in a couple of months ago.   _

 

_ His name was Grimmjow.  _

 

_ Everybody seemed to think that he was up to no good, but they didn’t really know him, only judging him for his unruly appearance.  _

 

_ It was different.  _

 

_ He was different.  _

 

_ After that incident, Grimmjow always seemed to be looking at him whenever he so much as laughed or smiled. And whenever, Ichigo looked back at him, it didn’t seem like he cared about being caught so blatantly staring at someone.  _

 

_ One particularly shitty day, that also happened to be Orihime’s birthday, he didn’t smile.  _

 

_ While everyone was cheering and wishing her a happy birthday and eating shitty cake, he moved to the back of the room and stared out the window. _

 

_ A crumpled up note flew across his desk and he looked up to see Grimmjow walking out of the room.  _

 

_ He picked up the note and read it, standing up as well.  _

 

_ When he reached the rooftop, Grimmjow was already there waiting for him and leaning against the worn out fence. The way that the wind would brush back his wild blue hair, made him look like a model. _

 

_ Ichigo took a step closer.  _

 

_ “So, what did you need?” _

 

_ Grimmjow looked at him in wonder and stepped closer, much closer than he would’ve liked.  _

 

_ He lifted his hands from his pockets which immediately raised Ichigo’s hackles up.  _

 

_ Ichigo was prepared for a fight. It would make sense after all.  _

 

_ What he didn’t expect was two strong hands grabbing at his sides and his uncontrollable laughter filling the air.  _

 

_ He shoved and pushed but the blue haired teen wouldn’t budge.  _

 

_ After a few minutes, he finally let go and Ichigo was free to breathe precious air back in again.  _

 

_ Grimmjow grinned and brought his head closer to his, tapping his forehead. _

 

_ “So, you can smile, huh?” _

 

And the rest you could say was history. 

 

A large thundering boom and raindrops landing on his fingertips made him more aware of the weather and he brought his hoodie closer to himself, trying to seek a warmth that wasn’t there. 

 

Ichigo sighed as he thought back to his boyfriend. If he said he wasn’t incredibly happy with Grimmjow, he’d be lying... but he didn’t deserve him either. 

 

Grimmjow was a music prodigy, he knew how to play practically everything. Grimmjow was so focused and concentrated on his dream not to mention extremely talented and Ichigo… 

 

Ichigo was just there. 

 

Ichigo was the kid who didn’t know what the fuck to do with his life. He was the kid that lost his mother and sisters in a tragic accident, leaving him with an alcoholic, good for nothing father. 

 

Grimmjow would be scouted by some huge talent agency and Ichigo would have to stand back, fake yet another smile and let go. 

 

The thought of it made his heart feel like someone was squeezing it for dear life. 

 

He sat there in the cold bench with his soaked hoodie and torn jeans, his hair feeling like a mop and his eyes probably bloodshot. 

 

Everyone took shelter from the rain once it started, walking and running past him like he didn’t even exist. 

 

Ichigo didn’t know how long he sat there staring at his reflection in the dirty, muddy puddle in front of him until he heard a huge splash. 

 

His dead tired looking eyes were looking for the source on the other side of the road, and when they did, they widened.

 

Grimmjow was propped up against a grey light pole, heavily breathing like he was running for a marathon, with black slacks, a white collared shirt and his signature guitar strapped to his back.

 

His now dark navy blue bangs hung heavily in front of his face, dripping with little beads of water. Grimmjow was looking at Ichigo with hardened blue eyes that looked like crystals in the middle of a gloomy backdrop as he walked closer to the soaked teenager. His strides were long and strong, like he knew exactly where he was going. 

 

He stopped in front of Ichigo.

 

“Grimm… your recital-

 

Grimmjow plopped down next to him and grabbed his head, forcing it to rest on his shoulder.

 

“Shut up.”

 

“...”

 

They sat there listening to the pitter patter of the rain. 

 

“...Stupid bastard do it again?”

 

“...Yeah.”

 

“Okay.”

 

“........”

 

“I’m taking you and getting the hell out of this place.”

 

Ichigo smiled ruefully. 

 

“Are you now?”

 

“Don’t even doubt it for a second, babe.”

 

The confident, sincere smirk Grimmjow wore on his face made Ichigo smile.

 

The hand running through his wet locks and the voice humming a familiar tune made him relax and lessened the pain that he so deeply held onto. 

 

“Sing me something?”

 

“Of course.”

 

He could hear Grimmjow pull his guitar out and tune it a bit before strumming. 

 

Grimmjow’s soft and gentle tone along with the rain made up one of the most beautiful sounds Ichigo’s ever heard.

 

_ Lift your head, baby, don’t be scared _

 

_ Of the things that could go wrong along the way _

 

_ You’ll get by with a smile _

 

_ You can’t win at everything but you can try.  _

 

The strumming picked up and so did Ichigo’s heart.

 

_ Baby, you don’t have to worry  _

 

_ ‘Cuz there ain’t no need to hurry  _

 

_ No one ever said that there’s an easy way _

 

_ When they’re closing all their doors _

 

_ And they don’t want you anymore _

 

_ This sounds funny but I’ll say it anyway.  _

 

Grimmjow turned his eyes on him and smile softly.

 

_ Boy I’ll stay through the bad times _

 

_ Even if I have to fetch you everyday  _

 

_ I’ll get by if you smile _

 

_ You can never be too happy in this life.  _

 

Ichigo could feel tears slip through his closed eyelids and he dug his head deeper into Grimmjow’s shoulder.

 

_ In a world where everybody _

 

_ Hates a happy ending story  _

 

_ It’s a wonder love can make the world go round _

 

_ But don’t let it bring you down  _

 

_ And turn your face into a frown  _

 

_ You’ll get along with a little prayer and a song _

 

Their hands intertwined as Grimmjow sang the last verse with only the rain accompanying it. 

 

_ Lift your head, baby don’t be scared _

 

_ Of the things that could go wrong along the way _

 

_ You’ll get by with a smile _

 

_ Now it’s time to kiss those tears _

 

_ goodbye... _

  
  
  
  



End file.
